‘God’s word is alive and working and is sharper than a double-edged sword. It cuts all the way into us, where the soul and spirit are joined, to the center of our joints and bones. And it judges the thoughts and feelings in our hearts. Nothing in all the world can be hidden from God. Everything is clear and lies open before him, and to him we must explain the way we have lived.’ Hebrews 4:12 – 13 (WEB)

Have mercy on me Father,

For my flesh hungers for destruction,

Battle ah go between the spirit and the flesh

Today one wins, yesterday the other prevailed

Meaningless are the battles, so long as the war is God’s

Redeemer fight for me, because I fear I am too weak

I ask and plead for strength

Because this loneliness is one never experienced before

And my flesh cries out in desolation

My spirit whimpers,  as I lust and want

Not as wanting itself would want

What paradox am I, what contradiction

That God the creator of love’s love should not be enough?

So I wipe away my tears again

I repent again

And I prepare for battle again, because so long as we are on this earth,

The flesh will persist in trying

So the spirit likewise must not surrender

Pray watchfully , do not sleep

Only to wake up in sin.

I’ll take your slander in my stride

I won’t crumble inside

No, there won’t be shrapnel for you to keep a souvenir

And I was a fool in lust

I will be humble in love

How sweet was the bitter tasting sin?

A snare misconstrued for a smile

I’ll just go home this time

No, when you return I won’t be nervously waiting

No soldier waits idly for battle,

No man waits for death

I’m putting on my armour,

How will I die when I serve the living word?