Category: Marriage

Single and Rich

BEING SINGLE IS BEING WEALTHY

Single and Rich

Many of us don’t understand just how privileged we are even before we say “I do”.

Let me explain.

When you are single you have a currency £$ of potential at your disposal. A blank chequer.

You have access to a savings account banked with:

Accomplishment, spiritual growth, personal growth and experience.

Whilst we’re single, the time we have for ourselves is probably at its maximum. Because we don’t (yet) have the responsibilities (privileges *wink*) of attending to and loving our spouse 24/7, as well as all the other responsibilities that come with married life – we are able to focus more on ourselves. This is the perfect season to discover your likes and dislikes, your skills, your strengths, your weaknesses and do something with and about them.

 

❤ Accomplishment

When we are single, we have a wealth of potential. Although God is penning our lives, He has already instilled in us desires, passions and talents that He wants us to invest into the world around us for His glory. Like the parable of the talents: The servant given one talent made two mistakes.

1. He was afraid and as children of God fear cannot be part of our vocabulary. Don’t be afraid of failure – He who started a work in you will be faithful to complete it. Oh and don’t believe the lies, when they tell you that you have to be a damsel in distress before your knight in shining armour can come and “rescue you” – I’ve been saved once already – by JESUS – so thanks but no thanks. And Guys, she doesn’t have to see you as her hero before you believe she really likes you.

And 2. He was lazy. As children of God we are called to a life of service, exploits and prosperity – just like Christ, just like the many examples of men and women of God in the bible. People who worked hard like David,  lived sacrificial and obedient lives like Abraham and served God courageously like Deborah. So this is the perfect time to take those godly risks and put your gifts and ambitions into practice. Don’t wait till you marry to become successful, take the talents God has given you to the exchangers now! Like the good and faithful servants.

So…

What talents do you have?

What skills do you take for granted?

Start with asking God what He wants you to invest in.

 

Ladies we don’t need to hang around idle, waiting for our other half to notice us. And Gents, you don’t have to considered every girl you come across and find your wife through trial and error.

Be sure of this, if you make yourself available to God and fix your eyes on Him, He will not hide a good thing from your sight.

Being single is being rich with potential.

So start fulfilling your God-given potential today.

Waiting with a purpose is sure to be a better experience than rushing through life’s seasons without one. May God pave our paths with His instruction, His mercy and His grace in Jesus name amen.

 

Stay tuned for the next post on being Single and Rich!

Peace & Love

Teach me how to love

So for those of you who have yet to see my latest video  

I basically talk about my decision to study relationships in accordance to the will of God and to use Joshua Harris’ books: I Kissed Dating Goodbye (new edition 2003), Boy Meets Girl – say hello to courtship (2005), Sex Is Not The Problem (Lust Is) (2003)… to edify me on this journey.

Chapter 1 – So This Is Love? :

After reading the first chapter, I was slightly overwhelmed, partially with self pity and partially with guilt. It’s hard to accept that every relationship you’ve had with the opposite sex in relation to romance and otherwise has been one selfish act after the other, hurting you and the recipient. It occurred to me that I really did not understand what it meant to love, especially the opposite sex. I felt sorry for myself, because I felt this may have stemmed from the effects of an absent father figure. Then I felt guilty, for trying to put the blame on my circumstances, and almost making the same tragic mistake again. I don’t think its advisable for any woman or man to involve themselves in a romantic relationship before they learn what it means to love someone, with the love of God as the affection we aspire to connote. That doesn’t mean idolising, but perhaps sacrificing, what makes you feel good for what is best for them, or as Joshua Harris explains in I Kissed Dating Goodbye:

‘Every relationship for a Christian is an opportunity to love another person like God has loved us. To lay down our desires and do what’s in his or her best interest. To care for him or her even when there’s nothing in it for us. To want that person’s purity and holiness because it pleases God and protects him or her’ (2003, p.19)

I had quite an emotional response to this chapter because it hurt to admit that I wasn’t entirely sure how to love someone, as God loves me. All I knew is I hadn’t been applying God’s love to past relationships, romantic and otherwise, spent in tears, loneliness and desperation. So what decision did I take once I experienced this revelation? I prayed to God for forgiveness, for my lack of understanding and selfishness, I surrendered my heart to him and I asked him for guidance and support. I then spoke with my Pastor (which took some courage and humility) and asked for a mentor, to oversee my journey to learn how to be a single Christian, exercising the love of God in all my relationships.

Now I’m excited, because I know the best is yet to come, as I grow closer to God, I get further away from my past and life becomes just that little bit lighter. Of course I want to get married, I can’t stress, just how much I want to get married, but it isn’t the peak of life. To me marriage sounds like a ministry, a means of serving and glorifying God, it requires planning, preparation and God’s support. I look forward to experiencing it by the grace of God, but I know there’s a lot of planning and preparation necessary, if  God is to add a relationship and marriage to my testimony.

I pray that those who need to make a similar decision will join me on this journey, to discover how to walk in the love of God, I pray God will forgive us for our selfishness and lack of patience by his mercy, that he will descend upon us the enabling spirit to love as he loves us, to be patient, disciplined and diligent to his will for us in Jesus mighty name, amen. And I pray that he will provide us guidance and mentorship in Jesus name amen.

What 2 Watch: Ready or Not

Will you be ready or not?

This performance from P4CM poets Ezekiel and Janette..iks is by far one of the most moving spoken word performances I’ve seen to date (I’m a spoken word artist, so my perception maybe somewhat biased), with the risk of sounding over dramatic. I was deeply inspired, moved, edified by the performance and the lyrical content.

‘I’m trying to remember why I was created’ – How many of us have even asked God this question and genuinely desired an answer, or do we ponder on this questions of purpose as an excuse for not acting? We get so engulfed in trying to behave as Christian as “Christianly” perceivable that God’s purpose for us barely gets a mention. Sometimes the answer is just waiting for a faith-filled silence, on our part, to trust that God knows the desires of our heart and he won’t leave us wanting.

‘Weaving a little bit of his will with a whole lot of mine’ – the whole point of Christianity is complete and total surrenderance, not 20% and not 99%, but entire surrenderance to the will of God. The more we surrender to his will, the further forward we move.

‘My love is based and his love is based on how I feel’ – Too often we allow our emotions to delegate the choices we make, I’m angry right now so I’m going to eat my feelings, I’m lonely so I’ll go and see her – who will make me feel worse than I previously felt, I’m jealous so I’ll tell her secrets or point out his flaws. To be gentle (One of the fruits of the spirit) is the antithesis of losing control of one’s behaviour  because of one’s emotions or basing a decision on emotions alone, without asking or receiving instruction from God.

May God enable us to be patient in love, especially loving him and led by his guidance and not our desires in Jesus name amen. x

Spokenword Sunday – Love

he-loves-me-he-loves-me-not-1He loves me

He loves me not

He loves me

He loves me not so much that he can say those three words

But I know he must

Cah, the way he looks at me, could be mistaken for lust

But I see the truth in those lies and I hope one day to find the prize hidden in all these disappointments

I know I can make a difference,

I see so much potential in you, though you have no prospects

You talk down to me and I’m the one tryna bring you up to my level,

In my fairy-tale you’re the handsome, teary eyed guy in the suit that lifts my veil.

Actually, I’m pretty sure that I’m too good for you, and maybe I’ll just move on to your friend or two,

But I’m afraid things won’t work out with them,

And I might get paranoid and start thinking I was right when I said Its me and not you.

If you like it then you should have put a ring on it,but I’m dangerously in love and I’ll countdown till your love’s on top so we can be together till the end of time, don’t be the best thing I never had.

Seems like Beyonce’s just as confused as I am.

But God is not a God of confusion, so who is really the source of this vision?

The one I could have made up, I was so desperate for love.

The thirst has created a bunch of zombie wifeys

Weaved out, high heeled to breaking point and tired of celebrating valentines but no anniversaries

Saying no thank you to the bread of life and never-ending well of water spring

Yes please, I’ll have the heartbreak, abuse and unwanted pregnancies.

Sad but true that some people choose to play this game,

Single and ready to mingle, it’s a shame…

But he’ll change, I know he’ll change.

No surprise when things stay the same…

You should know that you’re worth more than rubies

A product of the creator’s design

You deserve more than empty apologies.

I pray as women of God, we seek the patience to wait,

Like Rebekah, Rachel , Hannah, Ruth

Whether He loves me or he love me not

I know one truth

God loves me more

What 2 Watch – Breaking ungodly soul ties

This video a must watch for anyone who has ever put something or someone else before God, who has ever been obsessed with anything or anyone, felt trapped, attached or addicted in any shape or form – so most if not all of us, previously or presently. To overcome and avoid this occurrence in the future and to break the devil’s false stronghold over us I pray you will watch this video, ask for forgiveness from God and denounce every ungodly soul tie, bondage, yoke, stronghold and burden in your life today in Jesus name amen. Oh and just a final word, you can have godly soul ties too, but don’t depend on man and things, depend on God…

Matthew 11:29 – 30 (NKJV)

29 Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”

Leah’s story: Genesis 29: 1 – 35 (NKJV)

Prayer for God’s forgiveness: Psalm 51 (NKJV)

Have mercy upon me, O God, According to Your lovingkindness; According to the multitude of Your tender mercies, Blot out my transgressions. 2 Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, And cleanse me from my sin. 3 For I acknowledge my transgressions, And my sin is always before me. 4 Against You, You only, have I sinned, And done this evil in Your sight— That You may be found just when You speak, And blameless when You judge. 5 Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, And in sin my mother conceived me. 6 Behold, You desire truth in the inward parts, And in the hidden part You will make me to know wisdom. 7 Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. 8 Make me hear joy and gladness, That the bones You have broken may rejoice. 9 Hide Your face from my sins, And blot out all my iniquities. 10 Create in me a clean heart, O God, And renew a steadfast spirit within me.

11 Do not cast me away from Your presence, And do not take Your Holy Spirit from me. 12 Restore to me the joy of Your salvation, And uphold me by Your generous Spirit. 13 Then I will teach transgressors Your ways, And sinners shall be converted to You. 14 Deliver me from the guilt of bloodshed, O God, The God of my salvation, And my tongue shall sing aloud of Your righteousness. 15 O Lord, open my lips, And my mouth shall show forth Your praise. 16 For You do not desire sacrifice, or else I would give it; You do not delight in burnt offering. 17 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit, A broken and a contrite heart— These, O God, You will not despise. 18 Do good in Your good pleasure to Zion; Build the walls of Jerusalem. 19 Then You shall be pleased with the sacrifices of righteousness, With burnt offering and whole burnt offering; Then they shall offer bulls on Your altar.

amen in Jesus mighty merciful name