BEING SINGLE IS BEING RICH
Often times, our spiritual growth changes in pace and direction.
For instance, discovering a new spiritual gift within a short space of time or developing an enduring faith in God, over a life time.Yes the spirit is a mystery…beyond human understanding. But by the grace of GOD , HE reveals to us, what we need to know, when we need to know it.
I remember a time in my walk with Christ, when I found it difficult to pray. I would prepare myself in the morning, and soon after my prayer began, my mind would trail off, at times I would fall asleep or say things without really meaning it…
‘When I got saved’ (every Christian uses that line right…) the idea of a godly man appealed to me. I looked forward to being completely spiritually dependent on my future husband. So long as he could pray, he could speak in tongues, so long as his faith was strong, and he always said and did the “right” thing – then our relationship – our courtship, engagement and our marriage would be heaven on earth! As my passion for God developed, I came to a point in my life when I wanted, so desperately to be in a relationship (for mostly all the wrong reasons). Being in a relationship would heal my broken past, make me more God-fearing, and give me the spiritual fervour I saw and admired in my leaders at church and my Pastor – oh and I would be in a relationship – so that would be the icing on the cake.
What I’m learning now, which never occurred to me then, is that:
My future husband will almost definitely need me as much as I need him, emotionally and also spiritually. Our relationship could not be me at one end constantly taking from him spiritually, with him at the other end, carrying the responsibility for both of our spiritual journeys, and being drained out in the process. Just imagine two empty barrels at the end of the day.
Iron sharpens iron… There is a reason why iron sharpens iron. Because both parties are bringing something into the mix, which refines and helps replenish the other – by the grace of God bestowed upon them. Thus sustaining and encouraging them both in their walk with God and their journey together in pursuing righteousness.
So, I tried to make prayer the first thing I did when I woke up, but I found falling asleep came all too easy. So I tried praying after freshening up, which proved to be more successful. Over time I developed a kind of structure, and prayer points for every day of the week, which I followed loosely. I stuck to reading a chapter from the bible every morning, so that I could gain a greater understanding of the word of God – in order to communicate better with God in my prayer time. After all, you can’t speak a language you don’t understand. And before long, I started to enjoy praying – prayer points came to me more fluidly, and my structure became easier and easier to remember and follow.
I’m learning that relationships are physical yes, but they are also spiritual. In a God-fearing relationship, what you see isn’t all that you get – And isn’t that our bonus?! Like a well wrapped present, our real prize lies within. When God says two have become one, we can’t just take it literally, in the physical sense. But what we are being made to know is that before God we are now seen as one – even in spirit. So my husband’s spiritual state should be as important to me, as my own spiritual state.
For a relationship to thrive, the commitment of time, affection, and attention is very important, but so is our spiritual commitment and accountability to our spouse. Now that I am able to pray, when the season of marriage arrives in my life, I’ll be able to pray for my husband and our kids and family members and friends… the list is endless and I’m looking forward to it. Because I have developed the discipline and practice now. I can be that Super-Prayer-Warrior-Wife I’ve always wanted to be.
This is just one example. We may appear physical, but we are all on a spiritual journey. A journey God intended for constant growth and prosperity. So where do you feel you could improve spiritually? What spiritual gifts or fruits do you desire in your future wife or husband? Now turn that list towards yourself, do you have any of those gifts?
Being single is being given the opportunity to prepare, learn and grow.
So we can enjoy the benefits and rewards before marriage and during marriage.
May God grant us the grace to grow in spirit and to go from glory to glory for HIS glory. And when our season for marriage arrives, we will be anchored in CHRIST, and our marriages and our faith will stand in Jesus name amen.
Stay tuned for the next post on being Single and Rich!
Peace and Love
Did you know that it says in the bible that man should seek peace and work for it?
1 Peter 3:11
Let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it. (KJV)
He must stop doing evil and do good. He must look for peace and work for it. (NCV)
As children of light, peace is one of our inheritances in the spiritual body of Christ. However, peace like all the fruits of the spirit require discipline, work and endurance. Most of us don’t wake up in the morning being very patient or very gentle people, it requires consecration and the grace of God.
Recently I regained peace in my heart after de-cluttering my heart from past regrets, bitterness and iniquity. I began to pray and fast with a purpose, asking God to heal my heart. As the Holy Spirit delivered me from habitual sin and a broken heart, I found that my heart was silent from aches and pains and moans and groans, which had burdened me for years. For the first time in a long time, I wasn’t in pursuit of any relationship or trying to please and prove myself to anyone – trust me when I say it felt good!
However more recently, I’ve been struggling to keep this newly uncovered peace, and it baffled me as to why, when I’d overcome a mountain of stumbling blocks, and I hadn’t reverted back to those old habits.
It so happens that there was a driving force behind my dysfunctional relationships which led me to sin, it was the fear of loneliness and the desire to receive attention, some depiction of love and care. I’m not sure where it all began, but I remember moments in my childhood (and even today) when I felt incredibly alone, though I had siblings, moments where I was floating amongst a multitude of people, unseen and unheard. Times spent desperately clinging on to nice words and ignoring abusive behaviour and neglect which sometimes followed.
So my attention seeking, my need for recognition from others, my desire to be needed, loved and cared for, took new form, in excessive helpfulness at church, at home, wallowing in self-pity about how lonely I was, when I had friends asking me out, wanting to see me and me being “too busy”. And worst of all I became wrapped up in works as evidence of my faith and stopped believing in the salvation I had already inherited by the sacrifice of Jesus Christ.
The bible says: James 2:24 + 26
Ye see then how that by works a man is justified, and not by faith only.
For as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works is dead also.
However, there is one thing which has absolutely no life in it and that is works without faith – I was slowly slipping into “religiousness“.
As God is now revealing this to me, I invite you to join me on this journey of chasing and nurturing our peace, and exploring the various ways which we can lose peace – although it is our inheritance in Christ.
For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.
Have a blessed day, peace be with you x